All's Fair...STATE Fair, That Is...

I had a great time at the NC State Fair yesterday!  I met Shannon, her grandmother Nina and Nina's significant other, Frank who drove up from Wilmington.  We were later joined by Nina's son, Frankie.  We rode rides and had so much fun!

Shannon and I rode on three rides: the "Tilt-a-Whirl", "Alien Abduction" which was a centrifugal force kind of ride that Shannon didn't like much, and "The Scrambler", which was called the "Merry Mixer" when I was a kid.  Frank and I rode on something called "The Claw" which was scary, but not as scary as the "Drop Zone" or whatever it was called that Frank, Frankie and I went on.  Above is a picture of the three of us before we went up...and up...and up.  And the photo below shows us plummeting back to earth...

I had SO much fun, although my knees are so achy today from all the walking!  But I'm so proud of myself--I walked and walked, and I rode rides I never would have ridden (because 1. I wouldn't have FIT and 2. I was too afraid).  Food-wise, I didn't do badly at all: Frank, Nina and I shared a funnel cake and Nina and I picked at an onion blossom.  The onion was delicious, but I limited myself to a few "petals" and loved it.  Nina bought me a caramel apple, which I brought home and ate some of last night, saving the rest for today.

I was fantastic yesterday--fearless, fun, food-smart and fabulous!  What a great way to be!  Happy Sunday, everyone!

Dinner and a Movie...

Over the weekend, thanks to my friend's generous gift, I saw "Argo".  I highly recommend this "based-on-a-true-story" film.  Ben Affleck is stepping into George Clooney's shoes and becoming the director/writer/actor, areas which seem to be his niche. 

The movie was very tightly directed--and even though I knew the outcome of the film, I still held my breath in places!  It was fantastic.  Funnier than I expected and every bit as dramatic as I hoped it would be.  Go see it!

It felt so good to be able to go to the movies!  I'm going to the NC State Fair this weekend with Shannon (James' ex-wife's granddaughter), and I can't wait.  Of course I can't eat a lot of the food at the fair, but I WILL buy a caramel apple to bring home!  (And stretch it over two meals...or so...depending on how big it is!)

October is more than half over--does that seem possible?  It's going to be holiday time before we know it!  And this year, unlike last year, is going to be great...I'm feeling good about myself, my finances are going to be straightened out, and I will go home for Christmas (if not for Thanksgiving...)

I made a pot of chili over the weekend, and it's so delicious!  I always wonder why I don't cook more often!  A pot of chili provides me with about 10 meals, so it's very inexpensive, hearty and because I buy very lean ground beef, it's also good for me!  (Those kidney beans are just packed with protein!)  I had a little chili for lunch today, and then turned around and had it for dinner, too!  (It just tasted so darned good!!)

It's ALMOST Wednesday, folks!!  Have a great one!

A Reason? A Season? Or a Lifetime?

Have you ever heard that saying, "People come into our lives for a reason, a season or a lifetime"?  We all have people who come into our lives and stay for a short time for whatever reason, but if we're lucky, we have those people who are our friends forever.

My friend, T, is one of those lifetime friends.  I've known him for ten years--which doesn't seem possible--and while we've had our ups and downs, I love him...and I know he loves me.  I've been really down for the past month or so because I've been having a really hard time of it financially.  This new job pays considerably less than I was making--or at least it DID until I heard today that I'm going to get my Master's level pay plus the years' experience that my license hadn't been credited with before now.  It's a difference of nearly NINE THOUSAND DOLLARS.  Yep.  NINE THOUSAND dollars, which is about 750 dollars per month!!!

Anyway, T has been so supportive and has offered to help me financially--which I didn't really want but then he asked me the magic question: was I getting, at least, to the movies?  When I told him that I really haven't been able to afford to go to the movies, he went out and bought me a gift certificate for the movie theatre!  Now THAT is a great friend.  My escape, my coping mechanism, my island is going to the movies.  And T knows that.  What's odd is that most of my friends know how much I love going to the movies, but no one has ever bought me a gift card before now.  Isn't that weird? 

But I digress.  T knows me well enough--and cares enough--to buy me the perfect gift.  And I'll use it, too!  In fact I'll probably go this weekend!  I am so grateful to have this guy in my life...I can't even find the words. I am just so glad I know him...

On the other hand, there's James--my former fiance...you know, the one who said he didn't think he could be attracted to me if I lost the weight.  He was someone who was in my life for a REASON--and that reason was so that I could meet and fall in love with Shannon, his ex-wife's granddaughter.  I love her so much, and we have so much fun together.  I stayed with James much longer than I wanted to because of Shannon.  Truth is, James was--and is--the biggest loser I ever met.  He's a hoarder who lives in a dump of a house.  He's a comic book nerd, but not in a "cool, sexy" way, just in a creepy, yucky way. He's cheap, and anytime we did anything, it was because *I* was paying!  He wouldn't dream of spending any money!!  I ended things with him on August 27, and by Thanksgiving, he had met a new, super-sized woman who's way too good for him as I understand it.  She moved in with him and is now stuck because she lost her job, poor thing. Perhaps she'll find HER reason--and maybe it'll be the same as mine--Shannon.  Everyone who meets her loves her!

Anyway, today is FRIDAY...and homecoming at school, and a week before Shannon and I (and her grandmother and her boyfriend and son) are going to the State Fair!  I can't wait.

Oh, by the way, I've lost 130 pounds, and I seem to be pretty stable.  Not gaining and not losing which is fine with me.  I wear a size medium or a size large in misses, rather than the plus sizes I've worn for the past 30 years...and I feel GREAT.  James would love to see me fail at this, I'm sure, because that's who he is, but I have NO intention of failing.  I'm better than I've ever been--and I have friends who love me enough to send me to the movies.  How lucky am I?

You're Not Getting Older...You're Getting Better!

That tagline was used in an ad campaign in 1971 by Loving Care hair color.  (While I remembered the slogan, I confess I had to Google the company who used it!).  But for me tonight, that saying is more than a memory from my childhood--it's the truth!

Today, I did something I couldn't have done last year.  Or the year before.  Or for the last twenty years!  I completed a challenge course with a group of colleagues at a place in Ayden called "The Refuge."  We had a half day at school, and the intention was for us to get some relaxation and do some team building at this place.  A "light lunch" consisting of hot dogs (ugh) was served and then we were free to do whatever we wanted.  Some people played basketball, some went to yoga, and my intention was to read as I took my Kindle with me.

A group that was going to do the challenge course loaded up on the tractor wagon near the table where we were eating, and Pam, a colleague, asked me to join them.  I demurred...then changed my mind!  And am I ever so glad that I did!

Ultimately, I was more physically active today than I ever was!  I actually went over a cable spool that was suspended about 5 1/2 feet in the air!  I am a little achy tonight, but I'm also so very proud of myself.  As I came over the spool, I hugged the teacher who caught me.  And I cried.  

It's important to note that I didn't want to do the last challenge.  And the reason I didn't was because I didn't believe I could do it.  I also didn't want to depend on my coworkers to lift me over the spool, given the fact that I still think I weigh 300 pounds.  I know, in my rational mind, that I am smaller, but to feel that...to live it...I don't really know it at all.

We posed for the photo below as a group after we all completed the challenge course.  I didn't hide behind anyone, and while I think I look a little "lumpy" in the picture (I wish I'd adjusted my shirt!), I'm proud of it, too.  

It is FRIDAY.  Hope yours is fabulous...just one more week until payday!  (In taking this job, I also took a SEVENTEEN THOUSAND dollar pay cut--and went from getting paid twice a month to once a month. I literally have $3 to my name...) But at least I have my health!

It's Just Another Day...Or Is It?

Yesterday, as you know, was my birthday.  And I tend to say, "Eh, it's just another day...", but the truth is, every birthday is an event.  It is.  A birthday marks the passing of a year.  It marks the gaining of wisdom (hopefully) and the loss of inhibitions.  A birthday is a beginning.  

Last night, I went to dinner with a friend to the Twisted Fork in Raleigh.  I've never been disappointed there--and I wasn't last night, either.  I ordered the "Sweet Tea Roasted Chicken".  It was a half (!) chicken that had been brined in sweet tea and then roasted to perfection.  It was moist, juicy and delicious.  The skin was brown and crisp, and it was WAY more food than I could eat.  I shared half of it with my friend who took it home.  I ate half of my half--which was plenty.  It was served with garlic mashed potatoes (which were real potatoes, and judging from the color, Yukon golds at that) and "succotash".  Their version of succotash wasn't the usual corn-and-lima-beans combination that I know--instead, it was corn, red peppers, green beans and a bit of bacon.  Delicious.  I ate half of everything and packed up the rest for dinner today!

I was comfortably "stuffed" but my friend ordered dessert (which the server used as a place for a birthday candle for me).  I took just a small bite off the end of the most decadent deep chocolate cheesecake I've ever had.  It was terrific, but amazingly rich.  I couldn't have eaten more than the bite I did eat! (I wouldn't have been able to eat it all even if I hadn't had the chicken first!  After all, sugar is not my friend, remember?)

After dinner, we stopped at World Market, my favorite store, where I used my FREE Explorer's Club birthday gift certificate worth $10 to buy two pairs of earrings!  Happy birthday to me, indeed!  The one pair had a stone that matched perfectly the sweater I was wearing!

It's Wednesday! Make it WONDERFUL!

Happy Birthday to Meeeee!

I can't believe it's been two weeks since I last posted!  Sorry about that.  Things at school are crazy!!  As it is, it's nearly 2am, and I should be sleeping!!  Progress reports are due today, and my principal is going to observe my third period class.  The good news is that it's my honors class, and the kids are great.  Plus we're starting Romeo & Juliet, which I just love teaching!

It's my birthday.  I'm 55.  FIFTY-FIVE.  Hard to believe, because I don't feel older than 27 or 28.  I remember my grandmother telling me that she was often surprised by the old woman in the mirror as she never felt old.  I understand that now.  

Last Monday night, I went to team trivia with a colleague from school and her roommate.  We won!  I was really on my game!  Unfortunately, I also had a "first"...I vomited.  I haven't been sick like that since the surgery, and it was really my own fault.  Hannah and I had ordered these delicious Thai chicken lettuce wraps.  If I hadn't been stupid enough to eat pizza AFTER that, I would have been all right.  We ordered a pizza--it was small--and I had a very small slice.  It was very thin, but it was still too much, and I got sick.  

I needed that, I think.  I think I had grown somewhat complacent about living with this surgery.  It taught me a valuable lesson.  I need to slow down when I eat, and I need LIMITS.  Period.

I've dated a little in the past two weeks, but I haven't felt anything "magical", so I'm still looking.  I'm really not working at it now, though, either.  I want someone I don't want to live without--not someone I can live with. :-)

Have a fabulous Tuesday--and happy birthday to me!! I'm older, hopefully wiser and more than 100 pounds lighter than I was LAST birthday!

The End of Summer and the Beginning of...?

I know I said I was taking a hiatus from dating, but I had dinner yesterday with a very nice man.  Joe brought me red roses and was an absolute gentleman.  He opened my car door, the restaurant door, helped me out of the booth at the restaurant, and so on.  He was very chatty, but it was nice to get to know him better. He and I met online, and he was quick to say how nice it was to meet someone who looked JUST like her photos.  Of course, my photos are recent!! He has met two other women (he's new to online dating)who had displayed OLD photographs. (In browsing profiles, I've seen photos that were dated 1994! Why would anyone misrepresent themselves that way?)

While we were eating, he asked to see me again, and I said yes.  We went to Long Horn Steakhouse, where I'd never been.  I ordered the parmesan-crusted chicken, which was two grilled chicken breasts COVERED with cheese, and mashed potatoes with a Caesar salad.  I ate a few bites of my salad, a small slice of the crusty wheat bread and about 2/3 of the one of the chicken breasts together with a few bites of mashed potatoes.  It was really delicious.

Joe is NOTHING like any of the men I've ever dated.  He's quite a bit older than I, VERY Southern and pretty well off financially.  Totally not my type, which may be that he IS my type completely!  I'm going to see him again and see what happens.  Why not? 

I've lost another four pounds--I'm now about 13 pounds heavier than I was in high school.  I'm probably a smaller size than high school; the weight isn't a very good indicator as I have so much loose skin.  (Ugh.  I should ask all my readers to send me a few dollars so I can pay for plastic surgery!  LOL!)  

Saturday, I went to Wilmington to spend the day with Shannon, my ex's granddaughter.  God, I love that kid!  When I was in NY last month, I bought her a Tinkerbell lamp--she loves Tink, and she loved the gift.  She and I and her grandmother, Nina, went to lunch (where Nina and I shared the greasiest fish I've ever eaten) and then to the movies to see The Odd Life of Timothy Green.  I won't spoil the plot for anyone who hasn't seen it, but very early on, I saw the direction in which it was going and started crying like a baby!   By the end of the movie, I had gone through four tissues and a wad of napkins!  Nina cried toward the end, too, but Shannon just seemed to enjoy herself.

I was freezing in the movie theatre.  Part of my problem is my thyroid--I have a hard time adjusting to temperature.  The other thing, of course, is that I've lost 127 pounds of padding!  I have purchased a few light wraps over the past couple months--little "cardigans" to shield myself, but I didn't take it into the movie!  I DID take it with me to the restaurant yesterday--thank goodness, because the place was freezing!  It's been super hot here the past few days, and the contrast between the outside temperature and the inside temperature is just too hard to deal with!

It's Labor Day, which means autumn isn't far behind.  I'm glad--I have some new fall clothing that I really want to wear!  And maybe if it gets a little cooler, my 4th period students will be more inclined to do some work.  I'm spending MY Labor Day working--I have quite a bit of school work to do and my house is a mess.  I hope you're spending yours doing something at least a LITTLE entertaining.  Have a great day, and as always, thanks for reading!

First-date roses!