I love my friends. I do. But I need to put this out there. Please…I beg you, do NOT police my food. You can’t possibly know what I should or should not be eating, because right now, *I* don’t know what I should or should not be eating. I’m at a stage where I have to sample a variety of food to see if I can tolerate it. I’m not going to suddenly “go off my diet”. This isn’t a diet—I *can’t* actually go “off it”.
I understand that your motivation is love and concern for me. I know that. And I really appreciate it, but this is a period of adjustment for me. I don’t know yet what I will be able to eat. I don’t know if room temperature water will always taste bad to me or if it’s just a temporary setback. I don’t know if I’ll *ever* be able to eat popcorn again. I just don’t know. I am learning as I go along.
Wednesday afternoon, I went to Zaxby’s and bought a kid’s meal, consisting of two chicken tenders, crinkle fries and, surprise!, a Rice Krispies bar (which is tucked away in my desk drawer for a yet-undetermined future date). I ate one chicken tender after peeling away most of the crispy breading. It was very tender and very moist. Better than that, though, it was delicious. It tasted *so* good to me. I also ate two and a half French fries.
And that was it. I was full. It was better than being full, though; it was *satisfying*. And what did I ingest? Maybe 200 calories? Maybe. But I kept it down; I don’t feel sick tonight; my energy level is up and so are my thoughts. Oh, and just so you know--I threw the rest away. I didn’t want to overeat. I didn’t want to eat Zaxby’s again today—or even tomorrow. But I got to try it, and it was delicious.
So please. No policing. Again, I understand that it is motivated by love. But if you *really* love me, you’ll let me fall, stumble, and even succeed, on my own.