There’s a fine line between a hobby and an addiction. If you collect spoons from each of the United States and get one of each, you have a good hobby. If you have five spoons from each of the states, your collection is a little out of control. If you love cats and have three to six, you have a lovely cat family. If you have thirty, you are a hoarder. If you eat to live, you’re doing it correctly. If you live to eat, then you have a problem!
Sigh. I have lived to eat, unfortunately. My life *has* been centered around food, and now I have to change it. The challenge is daunting, but I’m trying. Yesterday, I went to the movies, where I did *not* get popcorn, but I went to lunch afterward, which I’ve always done after seeing a movie. I ordered what I thought was a good choice—grilled chicken tenderloins, mashed potatoes and carrots. I managed to eat two very finely chopped ounces of the chicken and two bites of potato and carrot which I macerated with lots of chewing.
This food tasted so good to me, but last night, I didn’t feel well. I felt full—hours later. I was thirsty, but I couldn’t drink a lot of water because I was fighting that full feeling. Today, I’m going full liquid again. I need to. Although I didn’t overeat—trust me, I didn’t—I don’t think my new pouch is ready for food like that. This recovery is one step forward, two steps back.
I think it’s important to note that I *wanted* this food more than *hungered* for it. I recognize that this is a habit I need to break. And it’s hard. Really hard. Still I’m encouraged by the fact that I’m willing to do whatever is necessary to feel better again. That shows me I’m on the right track!