Does Size Really Matter?

Relax, guys--I'm talking about clothing size!  And to answer that question: no, I don't think it does!

I believe in self-acceptance.  I couldn't accept myself 100 pounds ago, but I do now.  I am not in a hurry to lose any more weight--if I do, I do, but right now, it's not a big deal to me.  I feel good today.  GOOD.  I have more energy, less pain and more confidence than I did 100 pounds ago.  

Last night, I went to dinner with Whit and a few people from his job.  It was nice to meet his coworkers, but more than that, it was nice being confident about meeting them.  I wore my black jeans and a cute white top and felt good about how I looked.  After dinner, (Whit and I shared the ribs and barbecue chicken dinner--it was delicious) I showed the women at the table my "before" picture.  (The one with my friend Jeanie and her birthday cake from July.)  They were stunned that it was a photograph of me!  It's nice to get that kind of reaction, I have to admit.  "Hannah", one of Whit's coworkers, is a beautiful young woman who has thought about gastric bypass.  I hope I didn't come on too strong when I encouraged her to look into it, because I was really happy to hear she was thinking about it. I referred her to the blog and also told her to get my number from Whit if she wants to talk more about the surgery.  After all, my friend Susan encouraged me; it would be awesome to be able to encourage someone else!

Saturday on our way to the basketball game, Whit and I stopped at JR's on 95.  I bought myself a French Dressing" brand top for just $9!  When I selected it, I picked up a size large, laid it against me and was surprised that it looked like it would fit well.  Now, keep in mind I was wearing a 3X, so a large is quite a lot smaller than I've worn in the past.  Whit tried to talk me into buying a medium, but I knew there was NO way a medium would have fit.  He argued with me, "But you're not large!".  I guess he doesn't understand that women's clothing sizes are so unpredictable!  A large in one clothing line is really like a medium in another line and a size small in yet another! Anyway, the large fit fine, and I was proud of the fact that my "head" is catching up with my "body"...I'm actually seeing myself in a more realistic way.

At least I was until tonight!  On our way back to Whit's house after dinner, I asked him if we could stop at Sam's Club.  (For those of you unfamiliar, Sam's Club is a warehouse store that sells all kinds of things, including cases of spring water [one of which I carry in the trunk of my car always].)  I found a really cute "crinkle" top from Liz Claiborne for $12.59.  It's colorful shades of green and teal and spring-like and adorable, but I was drawn to a size extra-large.  (Expensive clothing lines tend to run small.)  I held it up to myself, and Whit said that it was too big.  It has a functional drawstring below the bustline, and I argued that I could pull the string tighter if I lost more weight.  After five minutes of back-and-forth discussion that I didn't need an extra large, I finally acquiesced and picked up the large, even though I was certain that it wasn't going to fit me for a while.

Well, you guessed it.  I came home from Whit's house, and I was stunned to find that when I tried it on, it not only fit, but it looks good!  (I'll have someone take a photo of it when I wear it to school--but it's supposed to be chilly tomorrow, so I won't be wearing it for a few days!)

Before the surgery, everything I read said that it would take a while for my head to catch up to my body, before I felt thinner.  Susan warned me about it, too.  And now I'm warning you!  It takes a while to feel thin, but I guess it makes sense, since I never felt as fat as I actually was!

It's almost the weekend--have a fabulous Friday!!