A New Adventure Awaits...

I know--that sort of sounds like something you'd find in a fortune cookie!  But I do have a new adventure starting--tomorrow begins NaNoWriMo.  For those of you not familiar with NaNoWriMo, November is "National Novel Writing Month", an organized free-for-all (yeah, I know that's oxymoronic) wherein crazy people pledge to write 50 thousand words in thirty days.  Yep, that's nearly 1,667 words a day.  It's not impossible, especially if you don't have a full-time job.  Of course, I do have a full-time job, but I still want to pursue it.

I first attempted NaNoWriMo two years ago.  During that month, I didn't write 50k words, but I did manage 30k, which later became the heart of my young adult novel, The First Nine Lives of Isabella LaFelini.  I haven't sold Isabella yet, but I am confident that I will--I'm actually putting it on the back burner to revisit another idea I've had for many years--this time in the suspense genre.

So...Happy Halloween! (And if the blog entries are a bit short in November, you'll know why!)

If You Give a Surgical Patient a Cookie...

she gets diarrhea.  Badly!  I knew better! I had a great Saturday--Fall Festival at school followed by lunch in Raleigh (pizza--didn't love it, but I should get points for trying!), "Puss in Boots" at the IMAX, followed by a trip to WalMart and then to Whole Foods.  I had never been to Whole Foods, but I had a Living Social voucher for $20 in groceries for $10!

If you haven't ever been to Whole Foods, I recommend!  Nice store!  Great produce (including things I've never seen in a store before--tamarind, aloe leaves, lemongrass!), amazing seafood counter and hot food and salad bars as well as a sandwich-making station.  I was overwhelmed by the selection, and like an idiot, I couldn't resist the temptation to try their chocolate chip cookies.

I'm not sure why I wanted a cookie--I haven't had one since August nor have I really wanted one.  Maybe it was the novelty of the store.  All I know is that I lost 1.5 pounds this morning--in the bathroom.  Ugh. I will NOT do that again!!

Yesterday was a great day, though...but I'm lying low today.  Have a great rest of the weekend, everyone and beware of witches, warlocks and such--tomorrow IS Halloween, after all!

Working for the Weekend!

It was a long week, and I'm glad the weekend is finally here!  Today is the Fall Festival at school; I have to put in an appearance, and then I'm going to go buy some resistance bands and/or dumbbells.  I need to start working out my arms, or they are going to get flabby!

Friday was Jeans Day at school--we have them once a month and pay for the privilege; then the money goes to the charity of the month--in this case, breast cancer awareness.  The jeans I found in the back of my closet a few weeks ago fit much looser than they did when I first found them, and I wore a new breast cancer awareness t-shirt that I bought from Logan's two weeks ago--it's black with hot pink and white writing and two sizes smaller than the "Kiss Cancer Goodbye" t-shirt in my closet!

Clothing has always been about providing coverage rather than style for me, but I think it's going to be fun to work on style! 

Have a wonderful Saturday!

Eating Light--International Style

Today (Thursday) I ate Indian and Mexican food!  Keep in mind that I can only consume 2-3 ounces at a time!  My colleague, who is Indian, celebrated the Festival of Lights yesterday, and his wife cooked--and cooked--and cooked!  Apparently she made eleven different dishes!  And he brought me a sample of four of them--beets, these amazingly spicy and delicious green beans and a spicy carrot dish.  He also brought me this delicious "candy" made from grated carrots, cashews, raisins, milk, a little ghee and cardamom.  Yummy! (Although I don't eat raisins--but don't tell him, I don't want to hurt his feelings!)  I also didn't want to hurt his feelings by telling him I can't eat all those vegetables--I need protein!  So after school, I went to El Tapatio and had my "famous" tortilla-free chicken burrito, which is essentially stewed white meat chicken with onions and peppers in a spicy sweet tomato sauce and topped with a little soft Mexican cheese.  Very good, but more chicken than I can eat in one sitting, so for $4.22, I got two meals!  

Oh...and I put on a pair of slacks today that are two sizes smaller than I've been wearing...and they fit! (Although I took them out of the closet and literally said aloud, "There's no way on God's green earth that these are going to fit me...").

And by the time you read this, it will be FRIDAY.  T G I F!! Have a great weekend, everyone!

Reality...

It's a fact that I've lost fifty pounds.  I know this.  I step on the scale and see the number.  I can feel how big most of my clothes are, and yet this still isn't real to me!

At this point, people at school are commenting nearly daily about my weight loss.  I get compliments all the time.  Today, I took a pair of khaki pants out of the closet--pants I put away a couple years ago because they were too snug.  I held my breath as I stepped into them and pulled them up because I was afraid they wouldn't fit.

When will it sink in?  I am fifty pounds lighter than I was in August.  Fifty pounds.  I bought an 18-pound bag of cat food last weekend and struggled to get it into the car.  I've lost nearly three times that amount!  Fifty pounds--the size of an average six year old!  Of course my old clothing doesn't fit.  I know that--rationally.  Emotionally, it's another story altogether.  

Squished...

Just a short entry today because as I write this, I'm dealing with a bad headache.  Ladies who are reading this, GET YOUR MAMMOGRAM done ASAP.  Men who are reading this, PUSH your LADIES to get their MAMMOGRAMS done ASAP.

Breast cancer doesn't discriminate--fat or thin, black or white, we are all possible victims of this disease.  Get your mammogram today!

I did!  :-)

PS:  Click on an ad or two while you're here, please...I actually earn a few cents when you do!!

Shopping...

I've been spending money on things that size cannot affect--earrings and shoes.  Yesterday, I received a new pair of Birkenstocks in the mail.  They are black suede and look a little like Mary Janes.  I have an average sized foot (7.5) but in Birkenstocks, I wear a 37, which translates to a size 6!  I've also bought about six pairs of earrings in the past two months, too--I really like how larger earrings look good now that my face has slimmed down.  Still...I hadn't purchased the things I need the most--until last night.

I ordered two new pair of pants online.  I bought two pair--one navy and one black--for school.  I also bought two different sizes--but both pair have the best feature of all: a functional drawstring waist!  I don't want to invest a lot of money in slacks that I'm only going to wear a month or two, so this seemed the logical choice!

It's funny how reluctant I was to push the "Confirm Purchase" button when I bought the slacks.  Part of me worries that they'll be too small--which is a foolish worry, I know.  Anything that doesn't fit today will fit next week--or next month.  It's an odd and comforting thought--and yet I was reluctant to spend the money on the slacks.  Ultimately I did, though--and I have to admit that it'll be nice to have some pants that fit!!

The Big 5-0!

Fanfare, please!  I finally hit 50 pounds!  Yay!  It's an amazing feeling, I have to admit.  When I started this back in May (yes, it was May that I first saw my surgeon), I had hoped for mild success.  Now I'm not happy with "mild" success--I want it all!

Before I had the surgery, someone told me he knew of a woman who had the surgery and changed dramatically.  I think his words were, "She thinks she's all that now".  I can understand why she would.  First of all, as one loses weight, one gets a lot of positive attention.  It may be the only positive attention one has ever received.  In my situation, I've never received positive attention for my looks.  For my brain, yes.  For my "bubbly" personality, of course.  For my writing skills, for my jewelry making, for my teaching, even, but never for my looks. 

People who have never been fat probably don't understand this, but I hope I do change.  I would love to "think I'm all that" for a change!

Urban Myths and Other LIES...

An urban myth is a story that someone swears is true--but it always happens to a friend of a friend of a friend.  But it really happened.  (yeah, right...)

Like the man who got bitten by a spider and when he cut himself shaving, he released thousands of baby spiders.  Or the woman who brought home a sick puppy from her trip to Mexico only to find out at the vet's office that her new pet was a rabid sewer rat.  And so on...

I wish I had a dollar for every time someone has told me, "Oh, my (fill in the blank) had that surgery, and it didn't work.  She only lost 20 pounds..." or "...she gained all her weight back..." or..."she was sick all the time..." or...

ENOUGH!  First, I do not believe for a second that anyone gained all of his or her weight back after this surgery.  I'm sure that people do gain after they lose a great deal--I'm sure that their bodies adjust, but all the weight lost? No way.  Second, the physician assistant I see has been working with bariatric surgery patients for more than seven years, and she said that she has never seen anyone gain back all their weight.  Third, I have lost nearly fifty pounds in less than three months.  The woman who only lost twenty pounds?  How is that even possible?  I can eat one half of a chicken breast at a time...2-3 ounces at a time.  That's it.  So how could anyone gain back a hundred (or more) pounds eating 2-3 ounces at a time? "Well, the stomach stretches..." is another story I keep hearing.  How can a little pouch the size of an egg stretch that much? It might expand to the size of two eggs, but not a dozen!!

Of course, what bothers me more than any of the urban legends is why people are telling me these things.  Why can't people just say, "Congratulations.  That's great.  Good for you."  Why do they feel the need to tell me their horror stories?  It doesn't seem to be out of compassion.  And as far as I'm concerned, I wish they'd shut up!  The next time someone tries to give me the "friend of a friend" story, I'm going to tell them that I didn't believe the spiders story, either!

Wow!

Over 2000 hits on this blog!  Thank you so much!  I really appreciate your support!

I had my hair cut today, and I joked with Charley, my stylist, about cutting off that 1.4 lbs  that I need to have lost to be at an even 50 lbs!  Well, she did manage to take off the .4 lbs! :-)  Thanks, Charley!

My goal for this weekend is to pack up clothing I can't wear, and while I'm fine about most of the clothing,I have three buffalo-check blouses that I just LOVE.  One is purple and black, one is dusty pink and navy and one is black and white.  They are long sleeved and designed with tucks/pleats at the top so that they billow a little.  Well, they billowed a little when they fit.  Now I swim in them!  I'm going to give away two of them, but I'm going to keep the pink one and ask a friend of mine (hello, Susy!) if she can tailor it for me.  I know that it may be silly, but I love these shirts!!

And it's time to go get new pants.  I have to.  The slacks I wear to school just aren't working for me anymore!  They are huge and uncomfortable because they are so big!

My friend Dorothy asked me tonight about my love life.  I broke up with my former fiance back in September, and I really haven't even thought about pursuing a relationship since then.  I guess it's because I'm busy working on me.  I have noticed that I get more smiles these days, and I like the attention, but I really don't need a relationship right now.  Perhaps it will happen--maybe it won't.  I'm having fun--and isn't that really all that matters?

Pluses and Minuses...

I am 1.4 lbs away from the 50-pound mark!  Of course, I have a lot more to lose, but 50 pounds!  I think that's phenomenal!

Perhaps it's because my name was/is unusual and I couldn't find one ready made, but I have always--and I mean always--wanted a name-plate necklace.  As a kid, I never found anything personalized!  Well, because I'm spending less money on food these days, I had a little extra money last week, and I ordered myself a sterling silver name-plate necklace.  The technology is so cool that upon ordering it, you get to see the necklace before finalizing your order!  And it came quickly!  But one of the best things? It came with a chain extender that I don't need!  I know that before the surgery I would have!

If you've never lost considerable weight, you don't realize how your body changes.  First of all, as they told me at the doctor's office, you lose weight top down.  I didn't know that, but it makes sense when you think that people can lose five or six top sizes and only lose two or three pants sizes!  That isn't to say that you don't lose weight everywhere, because I am losing it everywhere, just more in my face, neck and chest than in my stomach, hips, derriere.  My legs are thinner, and I've noticed that my knees bump together--rather uncomfortably, I might add--at night when I try to sleep in a fetal position.  However,I can grab my kneecaps for the first time in a very long time, and I actually feel lighter when I walk.

All in all, I'm doing well...glad I had the surgery and willing to recommend it to anyone who, like me, has tried a zillion other ways to lose weight, all without long-term success.  Drastic, yes, but aren't we worth it?

Packing It In...

This weekend, I'm going to launder and pack up clothing that I can't wear anymore. I'm rather surprised that it's quite a lot of clothing! I have oddly mixed feelings about parting with the clothes--I can't even fully express it except to say that giving them away is odd, like giving away a friend.  And yet, needing to give them away, not being able to wear them anymore--this is tangible proof that I am losing weight.  I watch the number on the scale go down, but it still isn't real to me!

Still, it will be good to give the tops that are too large to someone else who can use them.  And while parting is going to be tough, it's a sweet sorrow...

Yawn!

I'm tired tonight.  I had to do report cards today at school, and several of my freshmen boys are failing.  It's very discouraging, and I tend to take it personally.  I came home and ate a salad with some chicken, but I'm still feeling "blah", so I'm going to go to bed early.

I weighed in on my home scales today--and if they're right, I've lost seven pounds since I weighed in at the doctor's office less than two weeks ago!  If that's accurate, I've lost 49 pounds!! I'm just happy that I can wear my Shakespeare pick-up lines t-shirt!

Happy Wednesday, people!  It's all downhill from here!!

It's a Walk in the Park!

I had a great day off Monday.  I went to Cary and had a half of a spiedie sandwich for lunch.  Well, I didn't eat the bread, so I had a few chunks of grilled marinated chicken.  If you really "are what you eat", I may I grow feathers and begin to lay eggs!  I truly am living on chicken!  I took a small lunch bag with an ice pack so that I could bring the other half home, which I then ate for dinner.

After lunch, I went to World Market, which has to be one of my favorite stores!  I found a great gift for my friend Crystal, whose birthday is next month.  I also bought six little (.375 oz, about 1 inch square) individually wrapped sea salt/dark chocolate candy bars.  They are small, contain 64% cacao and don't contain much sugar.  I have allowed myself one a week when I have an overwhelming need for chocolate!  I don't really love dark chocolate, but the contrast of the bittersweet chocolate with the tang of the sea salt works for me!

When I got home, I took Jack out for a ride in the car--he loves that--and then we went to City Lake for a walk!  We only walked about a quarter of the way around the lake--my knees didn't allow much more--but still, we walked back, so that was almost half way around!  Not bad for our first time out.  Jack was such a boy, lifting his little leg everywhere!  I swear he hit every tree, post and stump in the park!  I was proud of him, though; he didn't chase one duck or goose in the park!

It's funny that one little walk in the park could make both Jack and me so happy.  Actually, I think it made me happier than it did Jack.  It was the beginning of a new physical effort that I actually can make--something that I can do, however limited, that is fun and exercise.  I look forward to cooler weather when I'm lighter and can enjoy the walk even more!

Denial is NOT a River in Egypt...

I ended yesterday's blog saying that life gets better as I get thinner, and I think I should clarify that.  First of all, life's better because I feel better physically.  Second, I feel better emotionally.  I am happier and more self-confident.

I used to think that my weight wasn't a problem.  I really did.  I thought that as long as I didn't have heart disease or diabetes I was healthy.  I discounted those doctors who told me that my weight was the reason for my lack of energy.  I never read beyond the headlines those articles about how unhealthy obesity is, and I quickly flipped the channel if I came across a program on television.

I am no longer in denial.  I know that I was slowly killing myself.  I am super fortunate that I had this surgery before I developed heart disease or diabetes.  My poor knees were bearing 75 percent of my weight every minute of every day.  Of course, my knees still hurt--the surgery I had as a kid made sure that I would continue to have pain--but they definitely hurt less today than they did two months ago.  My energy level is much higher and my outlook on life is better.  I've always felt good about who I am--I think I'm a really good person--but I'm beginning to feel good about how I look!

And with that, I'm beginning to think about all the things I want to do--with travel at the top of the list! Paris, Rome, Nairobi...who knows?  Maybe I'll even get to see the Nile! ;-)

Another First...

I ate beef!  It didn't make me sick, but I wondered if it would.  The doctor said that beef was hard to digest, especially well-done beef, but I won't eat it any other way!  I went to Logan's Roadhouse in Greenville--one of my favorite restaurants before the surgery.  I ordered steak tips and a fruit cup off the kids' menu...$4.99.  The steak tips were actually a little too well done, but I chewed them well!  And the fruit cup was really good--fresh pineapple, honeydew and red grapes.
 

Logan's was also selling breast cancer awareness t-shirts with all the profits going to the American Cancer Society.  Really cute shirts--I bought a black one that has the pink ribbon on the front and then a wonderful design on the back.  It's a little snug today, but I know it won't be next month!

Later in the day, I walked through Wal-Mart and picked up dog food, cat litter and a few other things.  Normally, when going there, I use a scooter to get through the store.  But I chose to walk.  And I came through it a little sore but feeling pretty good.   I must admit my energy level is really up these days.  Yay!

I also pulled a t-shirt out of my closet that I bought to support cancer research a few years ago.  It didn't fit then, and now, it's almost too big.  Great feeling, I've got to say!!

I have a long weekend--Monday is our "Headmaster's Holiday".  Not sure what I'm going to do yet, but I'm sure it will be fun!  Life definitely getting better as I get thinner!

It's Not Fair...

Nah...I'm not complaining.  It's a Jeopardy! style answer to the question--"At what place will Rhonda be spending her weekend?"  Sigh--I'm not going to the NC State Fair!

There are two reasons I don't want to go to the fair this year.  One, I can't walk the place--although my knees feel better since I lost 42 pounds--I'd have to rent a scooter, which I have done for the past three years.  It's expensive--nearly $40.  Second, and most important, I've always gone for the food--particularly the caramel apples!

I can't eat that way anymore--and the truth is, I don't want to!  I honestly have no mad desire to eat the way I used to.  Last night, at Golden Corral, I looked at the desserts the kids had loaded up on their plates, and while my eyes wanted something (there was one brownie that just looked so good!), my stomach did not.  And while the pizza didn't make me sick, it also didn't thrill me.  

Friday after school, I went to Red Lobster for dinner.  They have the best kids' menu! Broiled fish, grilled chicken, grilled garlic shrimp, popcorn shrimp are all choices I could make--for under $6!  You can even get a petite lobster tail for $8.99!  These entrees come with one side--orange wedges, broccoli or anything else they serve.  I had the grilled shrimp and mashed potatoes.  I ate one biscuit (I just love them) even though the server brought me two, five shrimp and a couple bites of potato.  I brought home the other five shrimp, the rest of the mashed potatoes and the biscuit, and I have a great dinner for tomorrow!

Just because I am spending less money on meals doesn't mean I spend less on tips.  I tip as if I were eating at full menu price. Just because I made this life-changing decision doesn't mean that the server should suffer!  She worked as hard bringing me my kid's meal as she would have had I ordered from the other menu!  So for a $5.85 check, I left her a $4.00 tip.  I tell you this because it's my hope that if you order from the kids' menu, you'll do the same thing and remember your server!  After all...it's only FAIR.  (Yeah, I know...that was bad!)

Oh, and by the way, this blog has had 1700 views! Yay! Thank you for continuing to support me! Tell your friends! (And click on an ad or two...)

The Bus Trip...

Okay...I didn't forget to post last night; I didn't post because I didn't get home until almost midnight.  The bus trip?  Well...here's a play-by-play...

First, we left school at 6:05 because we were waiting for one kid who was "just around the corner".  He was at a convenience store buying junk food for the trip.  We drove an hour or so, just until we reached the Virginia border where the driver announced he had to stop and get fuel.  So we lost 15 minutes there.  I asked why they hadn't fueled up the night before, and he said that the bus had been out.  So?  We had made reservations a while ago...not sure if that's a great way to do business... Still, it was probably best that we stopped--I had a girl get carsick and had to buy her some Dramamine (which I was able to give her after calling her mom.)

After we got back on the road, the door wasn't sealing correctly, and there was a horrible "screaming" noise that we listened to for three straight hours.  We nearly got lost twice--especially when the bus went on this very narrow road that led away from our destination!

We arrived at the theatre with less than five minutes to spare.  I *am* happy to report that the American Shakespeare Center in Staunton is amazing!  Although it's enclosed with a roof, it's built in a manner similar to that of Shakespeare's Globe theatre.  The play was terrific, and the kids seemed to enjoy it.

When we came out of the theatre at 1:15, we discovered that the bus wouldn't start.  We sat there for more than an hour while the driver tried to get his company on the phone, when the 38 kids with us began to get restless.  I suggested to my principal (thank God he was with me!) that we order pizza for the kids.  I used my iPhone and called Domino's who delivered 10 pizzas, 8 2-litre bottles of soda and plates, cups and napkins 30 minutes later.

Remember me telling you I was nervous about eating on the trip?  Well, with nothing but pizza available, I had to take a chance.  I *did* eat a slice--almost all of it--without getting sick, although it was a little touchy there for a bit.  Still, I managed, which was something.

To make a very long story (and day) a bit shorter, we sat on the side of the road for 4+ hours.  We did walk the downtown area a little, and the kids discovered an ice cream parlor which made them happy.  When our replacement bus came (from a different company) at nearly 6:00pm, we knew we needed to feed the kids, so we took them to Golden Corral.  It was the first time since the surgery that I've been to a buffet restaurant, and I won't be going to one anytime soon.  When it was my turn to go through the line, I *took* food like I did before surgery: a piece of fried chicken, mashed potatoes, corn, carrots, a roll and a piece of cornbread.  However, I *ate* half the chicken, without the skin or breading, two forkfuls of mashed potatoes and a bite of roll.  I don't know what I was thinking by taking all that food except that bad habits die *hard*!

We arrived back at school safe and sound--at nearly 11:30pm.  A long day, but one in which I made some good choices.  Not a bad day after all...

Out of Practice...

I went to bed last night and completely forgot to post!  I guess I'm out of practice...or perhaps it's that I have nothing to say!

The weekend was so much fun that I still haven't recovered.  Additionally, it's rainy and grey here in NC, so I don't really have much energy in the first place.  Add to that the fact that nothing of any great consequence happened yesterday, and I'm without much of a blog entry!

Tomorrow, I'm taking 42 of my seniors to Staunton, Virginia (about 4 hrs away) to a Shakespeare play.  Pray for me!  LOL  I'm SURE I won't forget to post tomorrow night!  I will say that I'm already worrying about what I'll eat tomorrow on the trip--I can't do much in the line of fast food, but that's probably where we'll end up...Maybe I'll just pack a lunch...

The Plane...The Plane!!

Okay, I'm back from my weekend in New York, where I had a wonderful time and found that I can't eat waffles. (even a quarter of one...)

I was worried about fitting in the seats on the plane.  Unless you're in first class, no plane seat is very wide.  (And trust me, I can't afford first class!)  So when I boarded the little jet out of Raleigh and saw the little seats with an armrest in the middle, I was worried.  But like most worries, it was needless.  I sat down, buckled my seatbelt and felt comfortable--even with the armrest down.  My seatmate was a friendly girl of nearly 22 who told me she was going skydiving on Monday for her 22nd birthday!  We chatted throughout the short (1 hour) flight to Reagan International Airport in Washington, DC.  

When I got to Reagan, I had to walk down two BIG flights of stairs to a bus and then on the other side of the terminal, I had to walk up two big flights of stairs.  My knees and stairs do NOT get along, so I'm hurting--even today!  I had to take additional stairs up to the plane--no jetway here and again in Philadelphia.  Ugh.

By the time I got to Phillie, I was wiped.  My plane disembarked at Gate F33, and my connecting flight was *supposed* to be at Gate F17, which wouldn't have been too bad, even as exhausted as I was.  However, I was very unhappy to find it had been moved from 17 to 4!  There was no way that I could have, at that hour and after doing all those stairs, walked the distance between those gates, so I went and asked if there was a ride available.  I waited less than five minutes for the "golf cart" which took me to my gate.  Yay!  I got into Binghamton around 11:00pm, and by the time I got my rental car and reached my mom's house, it was nearly midnight.

My mom was very happy to see me (as I was to see her), but it was late.  I don't think she fully processed how much weight I've lost until the next day, when she said to me, "I keep looking at your face--it's so different! It's like you're a teenager again." Um, thanks, Mom, but my wrinkles and grey hairs belie that statement!  Still, I know what she means.  I look in the mirror and see a face I haven't seen in a very long time (if I squint and ignore the wrinkles...lol!).

I had a great--if short--visit with my mother and managed to see my aunt and uncle while I was at it!  Everyone has been so supportive of this decision, and it was great to let them see proof of its success!  My mom and I went out to eat, like we usually do, but I ate a LOT less.  Red Lobster has the best kids' menu around, by the way--grilled fish, grilled chicken, popcorn shrimp.  On Monday, Mom and I went to a local diner that has great breakfasts.  She ordered the "half waffle special" which we then shared.  So I had a quarter of a waffle--and it made me sick.  I think it was probably the syrup--I can't eat sugar like I used to--but whatever it was, it sent me rushing home to the bathroom!  I won't do that again!

On the way back, I again doubted myself when it came to plane seats.  I was hoping to be on a little jet out of Binghamton, but instead, it was a propeller plane with ONE seat on one side and two on the other.  Again, I thought the seat looked too small, but I sat down and buckled the seatbelt without trouble.  Yay!  Gotta celebrate those victories!

And the Number Is...

...drumroll, please...42!  I've lost 42 pounds in the last two months! Yay!  I went to Carrabba's after my doctor's appointment and ordered grilled chicken from the kids' menu.  It was delicious.  I mean truly delicious.  I ate half of it, a little of the garlic mashed potatoes (which were REALLY garlicky--I found an entire clove of garlic in them) and brought the rest home to take to school for lunch!

I won't be posting Saturday, Sunday or Monday as I'm going to NY to see my mom, and I don't want to bother with the laptop on the flight. 

So...have a great weekend!  I know I will!! Thanks again for all your support--it really means SO MUCH to me.

Maybe This Shopping Thing...

isn't so bad...

I found a top today that I love, love, love! It's expensive, but I love it, and I'm going to buy it for myself as soon as I can afford to spend the money!

The color(s) are perfect with my red hair...the closings are intricate frogs--it's just exquisite and I love it!  I'm going to buy it so that I can wear it sooner than later.  And when it's too big, I'll belt it.  And when it's too big for that, I'll have someone tailor it for me!  

Maybe I was wrong about this shopping thing? (PS: Doctor appointment this afternoon--will let you know my progress! Thanks for hanging in there with me!)

I Did It Again!!

For the second night in a row, I fell asleep at 8:00pm!  On Monday night, I slept through the night, but Tuesday night, I woke up at a little after 11:00pm.  I'm not sure what's going on; I thought I had rebounded from being so weak and tired.

Maybe it's all the drama at school.  This year, our classes are bigger, our kids are tougher and although it's only early October, many of my colleagues are complaining about being burned out already!  It may be that I'm just hitting a valley.  I think I've lost close to 40 pounds or so--maybe it's just a period of adjustment for my body?

The other day, I pulled a top out from my closet, thinking that it might be a little snug, but that it would "do" for the day.  Instead, it was big.  I have no concept of my size now.  I say "now", but I'm not sure I've *ever* had a clear concept of my size.  I think that before I started this journey, I actually saw myself *smaller* than I was, but now I see myself as bigger!

I'm going to continue to pull things out of the closet for a while--after all, I didn't gain weight overnight, so I must have things that will fit for the next few weeks.  And when I first venture into a store to try on clothing, I'm sure I'll pull the wrong size off the rack!

Ooops, Again!

Monday was a long day.  I had to throw three boys out of my 4th period class--and I've never done that in the 19 years I've been teaching!  I had a faculty council meeting after school and didn't leave the building until 5:30pm.

I was supposed to go to rehearsal Monday night, but I just wasn't up to it, so I sent a quick email to the director.  When I got home, I reheated some chicken curry, ate about a quarter of it and felt ill.  One trip to the bathroom later, I was feeling pretty lousy, so I closed my eyes for a few minutes...

Yep, you guessed it: I slept all night.  ALL night.  Good thing I set the morning alarms or I'd still be sleeping!  I feel okay this morning, I think--maybe a little queasy.  I don't know if the curry was too much (it wasn't spicy at all!) or if I picked something up from my little darlings or what was going on.  I'm going to NY this weekend to see my mom, and I can't wait!  I really, really need to get out of town for a couple days!

Have a great Tuesday everyone--and sorry I missed those of you who are really early readers!

A Lovely Laid-back Fall Day...

Autumn has finally arrived here in NC.  It was only in the low 60s this weekend, and I love the change, although the 60 degrees in my bedroom this morning wasn't fun!

I've always loved the cooler weather, but in times past, it was because cooler weather meant I could wear sweaters and "hide" some of my fat!  This fall, I'm looking forward to the cooler weather because that means Jack and I can go for walks.  I really have to do some serious muscle toning!  My forearms are getting loose and flabby because of the weight loss!  When I was at the Y the other day, I saw a woman who must've had this surgery--she wasn't a big woman anymore, but her upper arms were huge!  I do not want to look like that at all, so I'm going to train!  Even my butt is mushy--and I've never had a mushy butt!

The pool is great, but I think I have to do a little weight work, too.  I hate worked out at the Y, because most of the people working out are real "pros"...I feel more than a little inadequate. Ultimately, I won't let that keep me from working out--I am just going to be tied up, time-wise, for the next several weeks with the play. 

The weigh-in (the official one) is on Thursday...stay tuned for the new number!  Have a great Monday!!

I Did It!

I went to the movies Saturday afternoon after cleaning a little and doing a LOT of laundry.  I found a pair of jeans in my closet--I have no idea where they came from, but they had a line of dust across the place where they lay on the hanger, so...  I say I have no idea where they came from because they are *small*.  I mean, they are snug now, so they could not have EVER fit me.  I am not one to return clothing, so chances are I bought them, they were too small, but I kept them anyway.  Anyway, now I have a pair of jeans I can wear for a while. :-)  They're "skinnier" jeans--can't actually call them "skinny" in my size!

At the movies, I bought popcorn.  I did it.  A kiddie combo, which comes with a little popcorn, fruit snacks and a small drink.  I ate less than half of the popcorn, enjoyed the first couple bites immensely and then found myself eating it without really tasting it.  So I stopped.  Yes, just like that.  I didn't drink the Hi-C (no soda for me) except for a small sip, and other than feeling slightly guilty for throwing it away, I was unscathed.

This taught me that I was missing something from a purely psychological perspective and that I *can* live without popcorn at the movies.  I'm really glad I made the effort today--and I probably won't need to have it again.

The movie, What's Your Number?, was funny and enjoyable.  I ate popcorn and didn't get sick.  I found a pair of jeans that I can wear for a few weeks, and I bought an inexpensive sweater in a smaller size.  All in all, this was a really good day.

Distortion...

After school today, I went to El Tapatio for a chicken burrito.  Unlike the last time, when I removed the tortilla, I asked them to bring it to me without the tortilla.  When the server brought it to me, I was happy that I had ordered it that way.  There's no "medical" reason I couldn't eat the tortilla--I'm "allowed" to eat them, of course, but I have such a limited amount of space, it's better to skip bread products and go right to the protein!

The waitress placed in front of me a (very hot) oval plate with chicken, onions, green pepper, smothered in their delicious burrito sauce and sprinkled with cheese.  It was delicious, but of course, I could only eat half.  I was satisfied--it was delicious and full of protein, AND it cost $4.01.  Two meals for four dollars! (Plus the tip--and even though I'm spending a lot less on food at restaurants these days, I still tip as though I was spending the full amount.  After all, why should a server suffer because I made a life-changing decision?  I left a three-dollar tip on a four-dollar check!)

I came home and found two "presents" in the mail--I had ordered two pair of earrings online, and they arrived today.  Earrings are a safe bet for me these days because "one size fits all".  I've always loved jewelry and I felt like a little reward for my hard work!

And it has been hard work.  But easily the most rewarding hard work of my life!  Today, I'll go to the movies in my usual Saturday fashion--even though it's still hard for me to skip the popcorn.  But I will.  The last three times I went to the movies, I had convinced myself that I was going to have popcorn anyway! Still, reason won out, and I sat through the films without the snack and was better for it!  I'm sure I'll be able to eat popcorn again--I'm just not ready to deal with the ill feeling it may cost this early in my recovery!