Friday, December 9, 2011

I'm Positive that I Don't Need Negativity...

Well, at least ONE person felt I was being harsh by "naming names" in yesterday's blog.  Let me see if I can redeem myself a little.

I have given up SO MUCH for this.  This surgery has changed my life FOREVER.  Imagine NEVER being able to eat chocolate cake again.  No more candy.  No more Krispy Kreme.  No more soda--at all.  (I really do miss my A&W root beer!) No more chicken wings and beer night. No more wine (for a year, anyway).  No more Christmas cookies.   Technically, I can eat whatever I want--if I want HORRIFIC (and I DO mean horrific--I know by experience) diarrhea.  Trust me, it's not worth it.  I can no longer "chug" a bottle of water, no matter HOW thirsty I am.  I gave up my fiance, who, as I've said, wasn't sure he could be attracted to a thinner me.  I have sacrificed a lot--and haven't regretted it except for the first two weeks when my pain was so bad.

But imagine making that change--going through life-changing surgery and all that means--only to have people tell you about all the times the SAME procedure has FAILED!  I have heard from at LEAST 30 people about "someone" who "gained all their weight back".  

I have a confession to make--as OPTIMISTIC as I am in this blog--and I really DO try to be the exact same way in life, I am TERRIFIED that I'll gain back the weight.  TERRIFIED.  I realized today that I keep the plaid shirts that I loved so much because I think I'm going to need them again.  It hurts SO much to admit that right now, but it's true.  

So maybe I was harsh in naming names, but I have reason to be, I think...I need ALL the encouragement I can get.  PLEASE stop making negative comments to me about gastric bypass, weight loss, or my progress or the lack thereof.  I'm vulnerable...and like Cher once sang, "Words are like weapons--they wound sometimes."

Have a fabulous Friday!

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